The soft power of women who no longer advertise their lives

It feels like everything we do is up for sharing, these days. Every smile. Every outfit. Every outing.

But quietly, some women are stepping back. They don’t announce it. They simply choose to live a little more off-camera. To be present instead of performing.

At a recent Durga Puja gathering in South Delhi, a few women walked in wearing soft handwoven sarees. Jewellery was light. The look was effortless. They greeted people, laughed, moved around, helped with little things.

But something was different. No one rushed to click a selfie. No quick group photos. No phones held up to frame the moment. No instant uploads.

Just people, talking. Standing under the pandal lights. Enjoying the evening without needing proof of it later.

Says Psychiatrist Dr Sanjay Chugh, “What we have increasingly seen over time is this overwhelming need for external approval and appreciation that people seem to have developed. Who they are in absolute terms has become almost meaningless to them. They seek validation from the outside world by posting carefully curated images of themselves online.

In contrast, the group you are referring to is still a small minority. If they no longer feel the urge to put themselves out there constantly, it is because they have recognised that the acknowledgment one gets from the outside world is, at best, pseudo… false in nature.”

Dr Chugh, who has worked extensively with urban adults navigating identity and self-worth in a hyper-connected age, adds further, “The second thing is that their self-esteem has clearly strengthened. They no longer need external applause to feel complete.”

For years, social media shaped memory through documentation. Events and festivals gained importance when witnessed online. Now, a growing number of women are resisting this compulsion. Showing up fully in real life but declining to broadcast it signals a quiet but powerful shift: privacy is no longer absence… it is presence on one’s own terms.

There is a subtle exhaustion in turning every lived moment into a visual narrative. These women remember friendships that thrived without Instagram proof, celebrations recalled through sensation rather than pixels. Choosing not to advertise has become a form of release, an act of reclaiming energy and attention.

There is elegance in participating without announcing. Dressing beautifully without posting. Traveling without geotagging. Celebrating without documenting. We live in a world that runs on likes and views. In the middle of all that noise, choosing to hold back feels like quiet power. It says something simple but strong… my joy does not need witnesses.

This isn’t about quitting social media. They still post sometimes. They still stay connected. But the change is gentle and sure. It moves from showing everything to choosing what truly matters. Not every day needs documentation. Not every moment must prove existence.

Women once carried the burden of invisibility. Then came the pressure to be constantly seen and vocal. Now emerges a third phase, knowing when to appear and when to remain beautifully unrecorded.

Those who recognise this shift see it instantly: the soft power of women who no longer advertise their lives is both deliberate and dignified, a quiet, unmistakable assertion of self.

END OF ARTICLE